I don’t even know where to start, I feel like moving out of New York City was such a big decision and something Ben and I talked about for upwards of a year before settling on a “yes.” We found ourselves constantly going back and forth – over dinners, drinks, long walks – it was conversation after conversation of “what should we do.” We just felt this constant pull between our heads and our hearts as we tried to figure out what made the most sense for us. What was originally supposed to be a one year stint in NYC, quickly turned into two years and then three. Were we done? Done for now? Should we do four?
One thing we didn’t expect during this process was the feeling of nothing feeling right when it came to where to live. There were bits and pieces of ourselves sprinkled across the US, but not enough in one place where we felt a pull or that “this is it” type of finality that most people experience while debating a big move.
Living in NYC was the closest thing I’ve ever felt to right – from the neighborhood we were in, to our apartment, to the culture, to the people, to the restaurants – everything felt like us. But, even though it had everything, there was a hefty price tag on the ability to experience it. People joke about not being able to leave your apartment without spending at least $50, but I can confirm that is 100% accurate.
Outside of the cost, we were also struggling with making a decision about our next stage of life and what we wanted that to look like (kids vs. no kids, home vs. apartment, city vs. suburb). I think if you’ve lived in NYC you can attest to this, but when you’re there – it’s end game. It’s everything. And it’s really hard to see a different version of your life once you’re embedded into the culture.
So after a lot of back and forth, we ultimately decided that the best way to take a step forward, was to take a step back. We decided to move back to Austin to regroup and better prepare for the future. We settled on Austin for a few reasons; our jobs were there, we still had friends there, and at the end of the day it’s still a great city that has a taste of the same cultural aspects that we craved from NYC.
It was also somewhere where we could save money and where we could test out renting a home in a more suburban neighborhood. We figured it was a good opportunity to gauge how we felt about the lifestyle shift. You can conceptualize a change like this all day, but (for us at least) it’s hard to know how you’ll feel and if it’s right unless you’re living it.
At the end of the day, the goal was to get some guidance and ultimately an answer to our biggest questions. Do we miss the city when we’re not living there? Do we still like Austin? Do we feel strongly about apartment vs. home? Do we feel a pull to start a family?
So in July, we packed up our NYC apartment and in August, we unpacked those same bags in our little 600 square foot home in Austin and started day 1 of our new adventure.
I’m not going to lie, I had had a really hard time with the idea of “going back.” I had lived in Austin for 8+ years and felt like I had done it and I had done it right. The idea of going back to a city I had already lived in and falling right back into my old routine almost felt scarier than starting over. But if I’ve learned anything throughout this process, it’s that going back doesn’t mean that you’re reverting back. Choosing to have a different type of lifestyle this time around has proven that there’s new in even the old and that there’s truly an opportunity for growth in everything we do.
Before we left NYC, Ben and I took some photos in our neighborhood and in our building. I would definitely recommend doing this if you’re about to have a big move as well. There is just something so special about celebrating and documenting the phase of life you’re in.
More to come…
